5 love languages – 5 ways to show love

Sexy woman with a pile of presents


What actions do you think are evidence of love. It is said that there are 5 ways to express love. Of course, there are millions of ways to express love, but there is a theory that highlights five specific ways: “The five love languages”. These five ways express how you show your love for your partner and in what way he or she shows his/her love for you. So, what are these 5 love languages?

1. Physical closeness

The language of physical cloeseness impies that you like to show your love and to get love through physical touch. Hugs, kisses, a touch when you pass each other at home, a hand in your or an arm about you when you are out, a hand in the back when you pass through a door, a caress over the cheek when you sit and talk is for you prove of love.

2. Words

If you feel that words are the proof of love, you enjoy hearing or conveying your love with affirmative words. Compliments, love words, loving messages during the day, attention spoken in words. You’re so nice, you look great in that shirt, you have such beautiful eyes, you make me so happy, you are so caring, I love waking up next to you, I miss you, I think of you, I love you.

3. Gifts

In this category, you expresses love in giving gifts. Love is shown through giving special gifts that suits you or your partner. Like bringing home a gift from a trip, surprising with a gift in everyday life or a little surprise on the pillow at bedtime. What about finiding your favorite chocolate in your bag when you get to work.

4. Unselfish actions

You feel that you are giving love when you do something for your partner and vice versa, is the fourth language of love – unseflish acts. It may be about taking a detour to run an errand for the other, picking him or her up, repairing a broken object, preparing a feast, fixing a bath, serving a glass of wine and letting your partner have some quality time. It is about giving of your own own time and energy for your partner’s well-being.

5. Quality time

The final language of live is recognising the importance of you and your partner having your own time together. Spending time together, focusing on each other when you spend time together and putting away the cell phone when you are together. It can also mean that you give each other a little extra attention when you are in company with others. Like a loving, affirmative smile across the table at a dinner party

If you think words are the ultimate proof of love, but your partner thinks that selfless actions are the finest you can give then it can cause unhappiness. You overpower your partner with compliments but rarely get any back. You become more and more frustrated, disappointed and you may feel unloved.

Your partner on the other hand thinks words are just words and do not understand why you do not feel loved. He or she who did x, y and z for you and deposited lots of time for your well-being. For you it is perhaps so obvious to do things for each other and you do not think of the actions as a love certificate. You want to hear with words how much he appreciates you. Talk about getting into a bad situation here. The good thing is that as soon as you become each other’s love languages, it becomes so much easier to understand, see and give.

Next time you can see / feel / understand / hear that the things he or she does are his or her way of showing love. As always: talk to each other. Ask your partner which of these expressions he or she sees as expressions of love. Compare, talk, give each other what you need, if you want an even better relationship. Or ignore it and live in your ongoing patterns. It’s your life, your choice. 😉

Do you want to read more about “The five love languages”? Follow this link.